Adam W.

By Adam’s mom, Michelle

Adam Walker

May 6, 1986 - May 1, 2015

New Hampshire

Adam was a hyper little kid. As he grew he loved soccer, skateboarding, roller skating, dressing to impress and very in tune with his appearance! In his school days he attended Hesser College in Manchester with his wife, Danielle, where they both graduated with associate degrees in Paralegal. They had a baby boy, Anthony in 2012 :). Best gift a mom could receive ♡

Adam broke his forearm arm wrestling. So the Dr gave him oxycontin for pain but never weaned him off. Just cut him off! Adam had an addictive personality to begin with. Drinking, smoking pot, pills, cocaine. Who knows what else he tried. But after he no longer had the pain meds he searched for other ways to help with the pain. So a "friend" told him to try heroin, it was cheap and pretty much the same thing as oxycontin. So he did and was hooked after the first dose! This is where I didn't know how addicted he was. I didn't know anything about this drug, only that all of a sudden his friends were dying everyday from overdoses! I couldn't imagine getting that phone call! But on May 1st, 2015, I would get that call.

Before that day, I should've seen the signs but didn't think it was heroin. He would constantly ask for money, living beyond his means, stealing, borrowing from friends and family, never returning an item or money etc. He would always go to the ER for pain meds due to constant tooth pain, caused from the drugs. He was arrested for possession, went to prison, got out and thought he didn't need rehab or meetings because he had been in a rehab program in prison and found Jesus through bible groups but he was so wrong. I will never understand why these people are allowed to leave rehab or prison without a plan to continue sobriety. I believe he tried to stay sober, he held a full time job where he had to talk to people all day. I don’t know how he did it. But towards the end, Adam and his wife had lost their son to the state, could not do what was expected to get him back in 12 months time. They ended up signing their parental rights away, no choice at that point, so our grandson was adopted. I feel Adam had given up, he and his wife were separated and lost his son who he loved so very much. His heart was totally broken. He ended up living in a rooming house in Manchester with a known drug addict who he found dead on a Wednesday. And Adam was dead that Friday. He had used but heroin didn't kill him, it was fentanyl. I will never forget that day as long as I live ."

To help me I'm my healing. God had already put resources I would need in my path a few years before this day. I'm a barber and had 3 Pastors who were my clients, that I always confided in during the process before Adam died. So I didn't feel totally helpless when Adam died, devastated and numb yes!!!!! I asked them for help and they would talk with me and pray. I was not following a church or even Jesus then, not knowing that is exactly what I needed to gain strength to heal the hole in my heart. I got involved with women's small groups at church and started reading inspirational stories online from others who lost their child. I attended a grief share group, through myself into heroin forums and rallies, but that was a bit soon, but met a lot of people like me and that's actually where my education on heroin addiction would begin.

Today, almost 5 years later, I'm in a good place in my skin. I love my church and church family. I have a whole new look on life today. My daughter-in-law is doing awesome, sober, healthy, loving herself! My grandson is wonderful! He has a very loving Christian family with 2 sisters. I have a younger son, Chris, who is the light in my life! My world!! Life is pretty good today. I'm truly blessed by God’s grace and guidance. He has truly got me where I am today.

We honor Adam by being not afraid to talk about him, good days and bad. He is my child, he did exist, not the best brother by far, but in general had a lot of good qualities. We honor him in a lot of awareness forums such as "Black balloon day" posts such as this one. Making sure his son never forgets him. It’s heartwarming knowing he remembers things about his dad. ♡"